Ok, I'm not talking about the yearning and desire to give birth, adopt or otherwise engage in childrearing, I am talking about the biological clock of lesbian dating, that's right, you twenty something’s , may not have heard of it yet, but any single lesbian sliding down the 30 ramp to the pre-menopausal highway, knows what I mean. Gone are the days of rolling over, reaching around and feeling for our underwear from the brief interlude of last evening....no more. Now that our underwear has twice the amount of material - they barely ever escape our sight.

So what is it about Aging and Lesbian dating that makes for interesting analysis? Something seems to happen to us, once we hit a certain age. We view our prospects differently. No longer do we look at her with the "is she breakfast worthy" look, now we look at her with all of our Character-flaw detection meters on in full force…..lights and signals are going off in every direction.
"Hi , So you say your last relationship ended, when she left you for your ex lovers, ex lover’s, new lover"….beep beep red alert, danger excessive baggage overload.
We view every character trait like it has the relationship failure gene associated with it. This isn’t always the best or the most positive approach, but sometimes we need to protect ourselves against - "So You say you believe in Channels and spirits to guide you, and all that for the low price of a buck a minute"
Well sign me up honey I want on board that! Let’s watch John Edwards tonight and see if someone with the initial "E’ is trying to contact us - (Can someone tell me why psychics only know initials….helloooo!)
Anyway It seems most of us have come to know what we don’t want from our next partner and we keep our eyes open for early warning signs, making dating somewhat of an investigation rather than what it really is a "Growth Opportunity"……Ok, so I learned something from Oprah and Dr. Phil.

The question still remains, are we looking to get married to the perfect woman, or simply for that someone we can sleep in the same bed with - without experiencing too much discomfort. How have our standards changed? I guess realistically we sometimes have to say, well her ass might not be as tight, and her breasts are beginning to show signs of sportsbraitus, but she no longer lives with ma and dad or that roommate "friend" of hers, so she can’t be that bad, right?
I think many of us start thinking we know just what we want, but then sadly we realize she’s taken….if in fact she exists at all. We can join are comrades in the incestuous world of date swapping, or so smoothly try to steal - the one cute lesbian in the group away from her girlfriend of three years, - don’t kid yourselves you’ve all seen it happen!

It seems there is another group of late 30 something’s whom think they have found the answer….. Leave the cat with the ex - and travel exclusively on the casual encounter highway. There seems to be a whole new selection of woman in this arena to pick from - You know the ones, they leave the boyfriend/husbands at home, to experience the wild side of female erotica. Some of these woman ultimately jump ship, unintentionally falling for the uhaul discount day trick, others simply enjoy the wild ride of changing their lovers more often than they do their sheets.

I suppose after living through the furor of the twenties as a lesbian and watching relationships fail, and realizing you don’t own anything, because one too many ex’s decided those things you “purchased” together belong to her - this casual approach is not the worst idea. After all at least you’ll get to keep your furniture - and that set of rainbow candles purchased on your romantic weekend together in P-Town last summer.

There is only one problem in this - we are still woman, and woman fall in love! I know you heard it here first - that’s right woman fall in love. Now take two women put them in a relationship and if they didn’t fall in love, you would swear they were not lesbians! No one really knows for sure if we fall in love, or we just think we are in love, no one seems to care, it just feels good - this much we know. …but we spend a hell of a lot of money in therapy when we break-up trying to figure this out. It’s pretty bad when you find out your last three ex’s all went to the same renowned “Lesbian” therapist - they would have been better off going together and getting the group rate…..and at the same time increasing there chances of meeting their next date.

I’m still not sure what happens to us in our late 30’s - 40’s , and why dating is so difficult, perhaps it’s purely hormonal, this we may never know. One thing I am sure of, my Biological clock is ticking and it has nothing to do with childbirth. It’s hard enough finding suitable dating material ….never mind the added pressure of trying to find the perfect sperm, can you even imagine what that must be like! “Hey Honey, come here you got to check out the tail on this one” - Anyway I think you get the point!